I can remember as a child when kids would say hurtful things, that my mother would tell me “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words cannot hurt me.” I understand what she was trying to do, but as hard as I tried not to be bothered by others rude and insensitive comments, it didn’t work. Words can hurt!
As I look in God’s word there are many passages that address how we speak. However, many who name the name of Christ act as if it’s ok to speak your mind. They make remarks with the intention of “putting people in their place,” or “having their say.” Unfortunately, I witness this as often in the church as I do in the secular world.
In Ephesians 4:32, Paul instructs us to be kind to each other. We are to be tenderhearted, in other words, have enough love and compassion for others that you don’t want to say something that would hurt their feelings.
Ephesians 4:32 “And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.”
When I sought out the meaning of this word I found many words describing “kind.” Here is the definition: good, benevolent nature, or disposition; indulgent, considerate, helpful, humane; mild, gentle, loving, and affectionate.
That’s a lot of descriptions for one little four-letter word! There is no way you can misunderstand what it means to be kind. Yet, I see people everywhere I go being unkind or inconsiderate to others with their words. Some even laugh and tell others how they told someone off. They get a laugh at someone else’s expense. Are we so self-absorbed and insecure that we must put others down to make ourselves feel good?
Paul gives us motivation at the end of Ephesians 4:32. We should be kind, tenderhearted, and forgiving because that is what God has done for us.
Colossians 3:12 “Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering;”
In Colossians 3:12, Paul again speaks of kindness. This time he tells us to “put on.” The words used here give the sense of putting on a garment. It takes action on your part to put on a garment and it takes action on your part to be kind. You must determine you will be kind on purpose. If God tells us to do something, and we don’t, then it is sin. Being unkind and making excuses multiplies the infraction because you don’t own your sin. Too many times we do wrong and blame a bad day or how we feel that day. I don’t think that will wash with God. When you stand before him one day and give an account for the words you’ve said, excuses will not matter. Matthew 12:36 speaks of idle words that we will give an account for. In this passage, idle words mean vain, thoughtless, useless words that accomplish no good.
Matthew 12:36 “But I say unto you, That every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment.”
Our words do matter. They matter to others, to God, and they should matter to us. Words can be used to build up or tear down. Choose your words wisely by thinking of others first.
